Tis the season to get married...

Marriage mystery...

Two people stand in front of family and many of their friends.

Before the priest/magistrate/officer of the land/God.

And give themselves to each other.

Forever. (I'm leaving the D-word out of this...)

I don't understand the leap that gets you to that place. It scares, excites and astounds me.

I'm not in that place yet

I enjoy celebrating with friends and delight in the love that they share :)
It's simply that I don't quite 'get it'!

The thing that I've come to realise and understand is that I don't have to.

Because marriage is the place for the expression of two individual's love for one another.

I would be skeptical of anyone claiming to fully understand the complexities of two people's lives being joined together so deeply.

The mysteries which surround marriage as a whole stem from the fact that marriage is an earthly representation of the sacrificial love that exists between Jesus and His people on earth. That He laid down His life for the sake of us. That we as His people would seek to serve Him in love through our lives.

In the same way that husbands are called to give their lives in loving servitude to their wives and wives are called to love and obey their husbands likewise.

It's pretty intense, crazy, cool stuff - as much as I've enjoyed all the weddings this 'wedding season' I'm glad that I have a break for a while! In the meantime here are two of my seasonal highlights...

"Firstly I must congratulate you on getting married..and inform you that statistically you are now sitting next to the person who is most likely to kill you"

- From the mouth of pastors....

"Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love", which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident."

- Captain Corelli's Mandolin

2011 (ish)

Wow, I haven't blogged in 2011, crazy!

My adventures at the end of last year can be seen on my 'OT's in Cape Town' blog if you want to be a stalker.

:P

I should actually also add to a December post to that blog - but can't really be bothered! Those who want or need to know the details about my the holiday in my most recent South Africa experience kinda already know.

I used to write alot on my blog - I used to feel compelled to share.

More importantly I used to set aside time to blog - I'm not sure that I feel many or indeed any of those things anymore.

There is one post which I have referenced quite abit in the past year when I've written blog posts...I am still writing it (on and off)

Its one that I can't decide if I should keep to myself, or share with my whole world (facebook!)

There aren't many options in between....unless I write about Twilight again and get a whole bunch of random and obsessed fans commenting again(!)

And its a slight 'all or nothing' scenario in my head.

So I guess you and I will have to see how that unfolds!

In other news - I am loving to hate the final year of uni...waay to much work for this lazy student to be bothered with!

And I am scared of the responsibility that will come when I graduate - especially if I choose to follow the career path which my degree sets before me.

When push comes to shove I know I'll be fine and get on with it, I'm just not relishing the thought of 'the real world'

That's all for now, I'm sure essay boredom will inspire me to greater heights sometime soon :)

Peace out x

Afterthought

And the whole 'i will blog once a month' initiative failed because I lack consistency in most organisational areas of my life.

Oh who am I kidding!?

I lack consistency, and self control.

They aren't easy skills to find once you let them slide...and I definitely never even possessed time management skills. (I'll argue that that one was genetic though!)

*sigh*

(Don't worry friends I am soon going to hv much more exciting things happening in life and I can stop with all this introversion and self-deprecation :P because I will be too busy to wallow and because I'm going to a place where my faith has tended to enter orbit/be in a more consistent phase....can't wait!)

Beauty

There is beauty in the victories of love.
There is yet more beauty in the failings of love because if a heart attempted to love sincerely; those who have suceeded must encourage and those who are still in the cold shadows of cynicism are compelled to hold their tongues in the face of the audacity to believe in more.

There's even beauty in the breakdown

Thoughts on New Moon

There is no denying it, I am an avid Twilight reader and follower!

The stories are among the most addictive I have ever read - and after seeing the first film, there was nothing and no-one that would have been able to stop me from reading the books!

I don't really have a 'team' (but if I had to it would probably be Team Edward...)
I get hopelessly excited about film releases and re-read the books alot.

However, when I do read the books or watch the films I come away from my time engrossed in Bella's world feeling increasingly unsatisfied.

Yes, the enjoyment I experience from the storylines and interplay between the characters is great but I dislike having to come back to earth with a 'bump'

The underlying theme which perpetuates the films and books is one of 'something else, something bigger'

Bella is simply your average, shy 17 year old at the beginning. Torn between states by her parents  divorce, an uncomfortable situation known to many.

Then she meets this guy, but not just any old guy. This is Edward - a stunningly beautiful, strong, multi-talented, mature, mysterious guy who happens to be unable to stay away from her.

OK, he does have a desire to kill her, but this only makes the fact that he chooses to love and adore her more attractive.

She finds out who he really is and that she will have to make a choice. She chooses him; becomes embroiled in his love, his world.

They revolve solely around each other - there are very few people whom they interact with - because of Edward's need for secrecy.

Then another guy, one of Edwards family adversaries who reveals his love for Bella and there she has another suitor.

Someone who is strong, protective, warm, loveable, funny, caring, persistent.

At this point, I can guarantee that there are approximately several million girls who want to be Bella - who wish to be loved unconditionally despite their obvious flaws, wrapped up in a mysterious, intense love web; where they have knowledge of what's actually happening whilst all her peers believe lies.

They want their life to be precious to a man who willing to (and can) save her, who is romantic and soulful, who can fight and yet whose world will always and completely revolve around you.

And then, when you leave the cinema or close the book you are reminded that there isn't any such thing as vampires and werewolves. That there isn't an Edward or Jacob waiting for you at home, if there is indeed anyone waiting at home.

That the man that you love will argue without instanteous compromise and forgiveness, that your scent will not be the most potent and attractive thing to them, that your love is highly unlikely to have any supernatural powers or - much less that your man will own a flashy car or have a complete knowledge of engine construction.

And so although I enjoyed the film 'New Moon', continue to engage with the Twilight saga and have those 'I wish I was Bella' moments I'm beginning to get away from the fantasies and fairy tales and into the reality of world.

The reality of compromise, of flaws, of possibilities for failure and unhappy endings.
And in this reality I hope one day to make my peace; if you stay in the fairy tales (especially this one) you can never be satisfied. 

I could tell that you wanted to. jump in the pool.

Missed the first month of my 'I will blog every month' resolution.

Brilliant.

Passed 2nd year comfortably - and an average of a 2:1 (albeit without considering the weighting/credit system...)

Seen Ellie Goulding, John Mayer and Brendan Cole live. True masters of their trades.

Have new fancy insoles to support my feet and get them in a better position when I walk. 

Facing the very real possibility of returning to wearing lower leg splints. This will continue to be a big psychological battle for me.

Have a slightly delayed post about the Twilight saga coming up!

Been writing several deeper and more meaningful posts - still - they might be publishable before I turn 22, you never know!

Should really be more motivated to finish unpacking my belongings from uni.

Have just under two weeks til an amazing to see many friends who are very dear to this heart, can't wait.

Looking at the new budget wondering what it might mean for the future of my career, our economy and the nation's outlook on life.

Liking my new blog background lots, hope you like it too!

Peace out x

There's quite a nice view from the cutting room floor

I'm working on a couple of posts -- have been for most of the year. That sounds crazy I know.

I'm using this blog to reflect on my walk of faith and the things I'm learning. I often use typing words in the 'new post' section as a second journal to help me bash out my thoughts and get some perspective.......not much of this ever gets past the 'delete' button; a lot of my thoughts are not really shareable in this forum -- not for me, not at the moment anyway.

I read a couple of random blogs and am blown away by some people's openness and honesty. Its so refreshing. I hope that someday I'll be able to share so openly about life's struggles - but not today.

So I'll carry on beating at the posts which I want to share......as a testimony - as a reflection - a sounding board for forward thought and new ideas.

I promise to post at least once a month to save this blog becoming even more boring than it already is....2 posts this year isn't exactly stimulating is it!

I might even put some silly stuff in too -- to make up for all the thoughts that hit the cutting room floor 

:) 

peace out x